SUBJECT ANALYSIS
Target: JP‑STUDIOS‑X (⚠️ Fictional Entity)
Module: Gamer Performance Evaluation v9.7
Initializing diagnostic scan…
Checking reaction time… ❌
Checking map awareness… ❌
Checking excuse generator… ✅ (Highly Optimized)
Checking “it wasn’t my fault” module… ✅
Checking skill ceiling… LOW
Conclusion pending… compiling results…
🎭 PRANK DETECTED
If you’re reading this — congratulations.
You’ve been successfully distracted by a dramatically over‑engineered fake rant.
No real people were roasted.
No actual gamers were harmed.
But your time? Absolutely stolen.
You’re welcome 😄